#303

I saw practically all of you updated last night and I felt the urge to join in. I do better with bullet points so I'll go with that.

• The apartment search still continues. It is getting to be super frustrating. I'm so sick of moving every year for the past 7 years so I was hoping we could find a place where we wouldn't mind staying put for at least 2. Maybe I'm just being super picky? I don't know. However, since we haven't found a place yet and my lease is up in 3 days, I get to move in with the boyfriend at his house with his two roommates. And the one roommate's fiance is also moving in due to the same circumstances. It's like a really twisted version of Full House. I just keep reminding myself that it is only for a month and I'll be gone for a week of it. Who knows, maybe we'll find a place whose lease starts mid-August.
• This being part of a couple thing has its ups and downs. Definitely more ups than downs but it's not always smooth sailing. Trying to figure out how to deal with stress and moving and a significant other can be hard. I'll admit I lost it a bit on Tuesday. I was just really sick of everything. Of being patient with others and them never ever returning the patience. Of them never thinking of how their actions are affecting anyone else but them. It's not him but I was maybe taking a bit of it out on him. It's really frustrating and I don't want to deal with it anymore. But a morning spent with Sniper helped me get back on track. And then I lost my phone which just kinda sent me into one of those crazy laughing fits where I just didn't care anymore.
• I got the phone back with limited craziness. It is a bit beat up and the lens on the camera is cracked. But it is functional and I really don't care much past that.
• I had a bit of a 'whoa! this is totally weird and foreign to me' moment when I was shopping for a birthday card for his sister and I realized we'd sign the card together. It seemed so official couply. I don't know why I had a problem with it and I got over it. I guess it just seems like something my parents do and they are grown ups and I am but a wee child still. Or something like that. But she liked my card and loved my gift and that felt pretty awesome.
• Lately, I've felt a lot closer to my dad than my mom. It's nice and I'm enjoying the conversations with my dad. But I feel really lonely without my mom. Our conversations seem strained at times and then at others, she can be kinda snarky at me. I get that she's going through a lot right now and I'm going through a lot right now. Perhaps we're just handling it all the same which makes it difficult for us to help the other one. I don't know but I'm hoping it corrects itself on vacation. I miss her.
  

#302

It is for sure cancer. I feel a lot calmer knowing but I think I am the only one. My mom is really off her game and it's weird. We find out what kind and course of treatment on Wednesday so for now, it's just more waiting.

I introduced the boyfriend (I cannot think of a nickname for him at all) to my dad's side of family this weekend. It was a lot easier than I expected. My grandma was cranky wanted to know why was he dating me because it sure wasn't for my high paying job but everyone else seemed really nice. AUNT and Cogene took the initiative and decided to invite him for Christmas and a camping trip in the fall. And then he accepted so I guess we're spending Christmas in Michigan.

#301

Getting a phone call from home at work is never good especially when it's your mom letting you know that your grandpa might have oral cancer. They find out for sure on friday. Normally when this stuff happens, my mom is totally cool and explains everything in her nurse like way. But this time it was different. She sounded worried and unsure and scared.
The cancer I can deal with, it's happened before with other grandparents. But she told me if he has it, it is going to require major facial surgery and that really gets me. Just the fact that my grandpa may not look the way he has always looked before seems totally bizarre.

I'm just really sick of cancer. It's been popping up a lot lately and I could use a break from it.